Dear Sweet Little Body, I am so sorry. I haven’t been a good friend. In fact, I’ve been a stubborn bitch who wants you to be something you aren’t, who ignored you when you didn’t comply, and unfriended you along the way. If I had a friend like me, well, it wouldn’t be pretty when …
Category Archives: Conscious Love
Worlds of Wonder — so much more than a pretty phrase
Worlds of wonder — such an interesting phrase. Are you aware that it isn’t just a cool expression, that it is actually true? This world, the idea of you and me and him and her … the concepts of earth and sky, dimensionality and reality, time and space … the experience of stillness and noise, …
They Lied. You Don’t Need to Be So Hard on Yourself
It’s a hard-earned, well-researched belief. There’s a mountain of support for it, an overwhelming consensus that says it’s true. It seems to pop up whenever you lose it and get angry or hide under the covers, unable to face the moment. It hangs around at the edges, waiting to claim a chunk of your heart …
The Promise
When Kenny was ill, we had a joke. He used to say, “Where would I go? There’s only here. There’s only now.” I’d look at him, and his precocious grin, and smile back.
Friendlies
Friendlies Watching Sophia today on our walk I wondered about inhibition and what stops humans from joining the fun like my little dog. She sees other dogs, other humans for that matter, and runs right up to them, wags her tail — hey, I’m friendly, are you? And the games begin. She is particularly fond …
The Rope and the Snake
I responded to a dear friend who asked a question about the messy human experience and how I experience it. After I wrote my response it seemed it might be worthwhile sharing with a few edits. When the dream is known to be a dream — think of the rope and snake analogy* (see below) …
Trained Seal Mind
Be. Here. Now. Experience. Awareness. Consciousness. Knowing. Presence. Love. Isness. This. Same, same … no difference. No thing and all there is. Nothing but experiencing — no one to experience — no thing to experience — simple knowing awareness doing it’s thing — slang expression — not a true thingy. Haha. Not tens of thousands …
Emphasis
Emphasis is divine, as is the entirety of this dance. Often, it seems like all mystics teachers gurus no-it-alls contradict themselves, or at least the ones we are currently paying attention to. It can drive one crazy. They point to the expressionless and leave the expression — you and me, the bloody squirming writhing human …
Life’s Masterpiece
I just had another heart event. And no, it wasn’t a blissful heart opening or spiritual breakthrough. My pacemaker-defibrillator came right up to the point of zapping me, but it seems the device was able to pace me out of v-tach without setting off its intense and deeply appreciated, but not at all enjoyed, companion. …
… Killed the Cat
I thought I was free — so many times. Freedom sang louder with each shift in my ability to be with life as it is. I can’t remember how many times I said, “Wow! So, this is IT!!? How hilarious that seems now. There is no end to the loudness, no decibel level that says, …
Voldemort or Harry?
It seems like a no-brainer question. Voldemort or Harry? Katniss or Snow? Luke or Palpatine? Robin or the sheriff? Who roots for the bad guy? I used to think choosing the good guy was obvious. I’m not sure anymore. A lot of Americans are choosing, to my understanding at least, the villain in the piece. …
Irreconcilable
Bastards in one storyline; heroes in another, lost in the first; awakened in its inverse. Same person. Same event. As a friend used to say, same, same, just different. Irreconcilable to one who labels themselves or others, who believes in a self and others, at all. As soon as one comes into being, the other …
In This Together
Why don’t we ask for what we want? What keeps us from laying our needs out for all to see? It’s easier to pretend we’re okay than to be authentically real, especially when that means looking like the loser we’re trying so hard not to be. Does hiding who we are serve us in some …
Rome is Burning
I’ve been feeling into this for a few days now. Well, actually this one’s been around a long time in different forms. I quit asking for answers to it in meditation because I heard the same answer time and time again. Can’t say I liked it. Many of you know I have written about this …
It’s Both
Life is a wondrous adventure, a daring escapade, the preciousness of a seemingly separate being, struggling for connectedness amid the vacillating yet compelling uncertainty of letting go in full surrender to our interdependency, our inherent and abundant symbioses. The separate self screams its denial, its holy terror, clutched in outrage, spewing out its abject rejection …
Amaya Gayle 