Embedded

Forgiveness comes in waves, unexpected, glorious waves. Nothing is ever wasted, not even a sci-fi series. I’d enjoyed it., thoroughly delighted in the plots and characters, but didn’t realize how wondrous a gift these books were until today. I’d mistakenly called them something else: a bit of fluff, a fun distraction, a waste of time. …

Tree of Knowledge

If I look at Consciousness as God — yeah, I know God is a stretch and a loaded word, but play along with me — as the seamless timeless spaceless definitionless undivided changeless Now from which all form arises, in which all form appears, into which all form returns, then the form world, the cosmos …

Holding On

Holding On You never know how much you are holding onto until life removes what you were holding onto. Seems strange doesn’t it? When Kenny died, when life removed the beautiful man I was holding onto, I was stuck by how much I was holding onto his life, how I clung to hopes for a …

Trash Talk

I’m done trash talking this little body of mine. Love myself does include loving my body. Can’t get around it. I’ve left it behind, squirmed when I walked by the mirror naked, heck clothed for that matter, and totally ignored it when I could. No wonder it’s hurting. When I was a child my dad …

Broken

I am broken. Profoundly broken. Humpty Dumpty broken. Having seen through the veils of separation, rather than a life of bliss, I find my inherent brokenness — that which I ran from, that which pushed me into self sacrifice and sucked out all that I was — still here, the same but different. I taste …

I’m Sorry

Love means never having to say you’re sorry.” Do you remember that quote? Does understanding the perfection of our experiences, that everything happens as it does and that we learn and grow from it as we can in the moment, mean that we forgo the shared connection, that we overlook the cry of pain? Even …

Source Code Genesis II

In October of 2013 I wrote a post called Source Code Genesis. (linked below) It represented a considerable breakthrough in my thinking at the time, helping me see how physical injuries are prolonged, solidified in the 3D. I discovered a process whereby I stepped back and back and back — one step at a time …

I Did Not Know

I didn’t know what I did not know. I know that’s a common phrase but it holds such uncommon truth. I spoke of truth. I acknowledged the Oneness, consciousness as All. The Universe moved through me, informed my awareness, speaking without the precursor of thoughts. Healing energy poured through me as it would, when it …

Sleepy Time

How’s your sleep? Do you fall easily into the void at bedtime? Do you lay your head on the pillow and go out like a light? Can you enter into the Now so completely that nothing of this world remains? Or is it a little bit tougher for you? My body hasn’t quite caught up …

The Bodhi Tree

Last night I was graced with crystal clear seeing of the twisted lie that is the separate self. It, as usual, came on the heels of hell night.   Yesterday started with a big bang – a body shock that set my world reeling. It was not the device implanted in my chest. It was …

YES

“I did not come to teach you. I came to love you.” I saw this on a meme today and it stopped me in my tracks. What if instead of lesson after lesson, so many hard earned and painful, This That Is is simply loving us and it is only our resistance to love that …

Life Lessons

Over the past months I have learned these lessons the hard way, or what I’d term hard if I didn’t know there is no hard or easy, rather just the way life is expressing itself now. Life has a way of fine-tuning us, of not allowing old patterns any space to thrive. Eventually all that …

Silent Stillness

I’ve been experiencing my last breath for the past 15 months — a physical actuality because of an apparent heart issue that has the immediate potential of ending my life. Each month has brought a deeper experience as less and less control over my health arose. It was only last night as I was experiencing …

The Lie

The cosmic video game, the one that holds my life and my impressions of this world, including all the others I am aware of, is glitching. These days I often notice its unreality. It blinks in and out, feels like it is falling into a gazillion pieces, like the dome in the Jim Carrey movie, …

Love’s Legacy

I found myself in resistance. Occasionally I still reside there for a moment or two, an hour or more … or longer? I’m not really sure anymore. Funny. It doesn’t appear to be mental, simply a perfect storm of life coalescing into an out of control physical experience. Shocks pepper my body — hand, head, …