There are times, even now, when the fact that I did my best wasn’t good enough. I know, deep down, that my life, and those it touched, couldn’t have been otherwise and yet, I ache with the recognition honed from years of new experiences fired in the kiln of inner work, that I hurt others, …
Category Archives: Mystery
The Circus Still Comes to Town
What does it mean to not mind what happens? We humans have so many stories about it. Does it mean that we think pain and suffering are just fine, or that folks that hurt children aren’t doing something bad? Does it mean that we’re okay with poverty and war, with human trafficking, rapists and murderers? …
Free to Be
There are 8 billion (and counting) paths to travel in this world. Is that delightful to your way of seeing things, slightly intimidating, or simply wrong, wrong, wrong? There was a time when I might have found myself in the last category, when my way, the way I was raised to be, the way that …
It Never Will
What is unconditional love? There are so many definitions out there, none of which — including mine — that even come close to having a monopoly on truth. Isn’t that grand! I adore that the unconditioned cannot be conditioned by words. If it could, it wouldn’t be unconditional would it? People attempt — and I …
I Do Not Know
When you pop out-of-body, what pops? What is left behind to be seen? If what you are is not embodied flesh and blood, or spirit encased in a body, what are you? The very fact that an out-of-body experience is possible opens Pandora’s box to many questions that seem unanswerable, to many answers that are …
The Struggle that I Took On
I wonder … if I hadn’t had the experiences life granted me, who would I be? If instead of adversity I had been given ease, abundance, and love, would I be this version of me? It doesn’t seem so. Looking at a friend’s pictures, a friend who hasn’t seen death, who still is surrounded by …
The Game of Life
I’m seeing a lot of people, many considered gurus, talking about seeing the game so that we can change the game. That seems daft to me, but what do I know. If you see it’s a game, wouldn’t you have to realize that it is a game and that the game will play on regardless …
Nessie –
Language — words and phrases — we are such a clever species. With the addition of ‘ness’ (something within us knew we had to invent that one) we turn adjectives into nouns, or we try to. We take attributes, qualities, seeming conditions, and flip them on their backs to rub their tummies as something definable, …
I Used to Think … so many things
I used to think so many things, that I wouldn’t want to be a cop, to be constantly face to face with crimes of passion and desperation. I used to think that even so, I’d have been a great detective, that my mind would have reveled in the challenge, putting together pieces of the human …
Before You Await Your Ascension …
For years the spiritual left, as well as the fundamentalist right, have been predicting a mass awakening, a shift in consciousness, movement from the horrors of this world that will usher in a more user-friendly realm. Some see that as happening with the return of their particular hero. It’s interesting to note that depending on …
What Are Your Impossible Things?
We are, this is, the higher level and the seemingly mundane or lower level. Laughing. The ideas of levels is one the ways the human brain splits apart this that is not two in order to try to grok what’s happening here. No one really knows, no matter how smart or sure they sound. This …
The Face of Love
I believed I loved. I said the words. I acted in accord. But I did not truly love. I loved the best I could, knowing not what love is. I had no idea what it means to love, to be love. I had no idea of my true estate, the true estate of life itself, …
An Ordinary Life
Perhaps I shall live my life in an ordinary way. Seeker energy no longer drives me. That part of life is done. The chase, the focus on teachings, on sitting, on learning what’s real has slipped away. Maybe now I will simply live. For me at least, not being a seeker doesn’t mean that curiosity …
Cracking Open
When your heart is breaking it feels like the pieces will never fit together again. They won’t, not in the same way. That’s is an unavoidable consequence of life. The breaking always leaves cracks, spaces where the light of loss pours itself into the world and what a gift that is! You don’t let the …
I Do Love a Good Mystery
Does it matter? There’s nothing here appearing as everything. I have no input into what happens even though everything that happens is influenced by what I do or do not do. Each experience instantly — no more than that and less — repopulates the data field of manifestation with each new breath, each new thought, …
Amaya Gayle 